Being Sick Sucks

Wonder on the very very very long absence? I have been sick… ALOT. No i don’t have a deadly illness but sometimes i feel like i do! Here is why…

I have always had something wrong with me since i was in Jr. High. It all started with my migraines. They just appeared one day and were so bad i had to be taken to the doctor. I had X-Rays, C-Scans, and MRI’s. They couldn’t find WHY i had such horrible Migraines, and these Migraines were the one that made me stay in bed all day in the dark with something cold on my head. But with my MRI they did find i have Hydrocephalus, which is a condition that has extra fluid in the brain, which can be life threating, luckily for me it wasn’t that bad so i didn’t need surgery but for the rest of my life i have to have C-Scans and MRI’s to make sure the fluid is fine. Also this wasn’t the cause of my Migraines, actually til this day, i don’t know why i have them. Then of course there was the Car Accident in 2003 that tore up my shoulder and injured my back. I had surgery on my shoulder and they couldn’t see why my back was hurting the way it did but now i am at a point where i can’t work. I can’t stand for that long, i can’t carry anything heavy and i can’t bend or be at the computer for a long period of time. Which basically eliminates every job out there. Then of course in 2007 i got a cold that turned into Bronchitis then turned into Pneumonia, ever since that day i have had 7 Bronchitis attacks and 2 more Pneumonia, i even had it when i was pregnant. I can’t have a common cold or flu, and even if i do they last more then 3 weeks. I could be sick for almost 2 months at a time. Still doctors don’t know why! Then their is having my Daughter, unfortunally when i was pregnant i had a heart condition, basically my heart couldn’t handle all the extra blood flow so my heart was pumping 100-130 bpm and i was on bed rest for half of my pregnancy. After having her my heart got a little bit better but i had to be careful with my activities. Also the ligaments in my back stretched out so much and didn’t snap back like they should have, my pelvis is not straight and now my right leg is a tad longer, which causes my back to hurt even more then it did before.

So to wrap all this up, I suffer from Migraines, Broncities, Pneumonia, on occasion. I am in pain all day every day for shoulder, back and leg pain. Leg pain is probably due to the extra weight i gained from the pregnancy but since i have lost 30 lbs they don’t hurt as much anymore, yay. I take pain killers just to get through the day and i am suppose to have another surgery on my shoulder but never had the time or insurance to do it. I can’t work which some people don’t understand and that is frustrating to me. I want to work, especially become a photographer, but no one will really give me the chance. I put alot of trust in the Lord to give me the opportunities and be able to take care of my daughter, but sometimes i can have my down days. But never knowing when i can have an attack or get sick over a small cold is kind of scary… i can feel great one day and the next i am out for a few weeks. It can get a bit depressing… especially seeing a Little girl all sad and upset she can’t spend time with her mommy and she doesn’t know why!

Also i am allergic to the Flu Shot so i can’t take that either…

I guess its bitter sweet for me… i am happy to know i don’t have cancer or any other deadly disease or going through what other people go through everyday, i mean i am truly blessed… but not knowing why i get so sick and i can’t do anything about it is frustrating. So ya this is why i haven’t been on here or doing my photography because i have been sick. Alot. Just pray i can get well and never have to worry about this again!!! My migraines are some what under control… i do get them once in a while and i just take my meds and they go away… but never knowing when i can get them is scary and with Summer coming… i see myself sick ALOT again since i am not allowed to be out in the sun for a long period or get really hot… because AGAIN i will get sick. So if anyone has had questions… here is why!

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